Today I noticed how I, like many humans want what we don’t have. In some areas this forces us to grow as individuals and to connect with others. That Tenth Commandment principle helps to keep us humble.
For example, I have an innate gift for music. Ironically, though I easily keep tempo, I fail epically at playing drums. I lack the coordination to keep the beat outside of my head. Regardless of any genre I like, I feel percussion and rhythm. However, despite practice over the years, I only rock an air drum.
Today I reflect how, as a child with a competitive spirit, that ineptitude discouraged me away from music for a long season. About the same time I got over it, I discovered Thoreau. I distinctly recall feeling my different drummer reading Walden. Though I lack coordination, fumbling my way around a guitar or keyboard I loved music again (despite my secret longing to play drums well).
Today my most recent life lesson came from class assignments. I enrolled in two WordPress Blogging U courses early, not realizing the first class actually began while I would be removed from technology, save my phone. Additionally, upon my return, health care procedures and post-op care (yeah, mind-hindering drugs) complicated my daily rhythm, and doing the assignments. So, half-way through the second week I felt entirely out of sync, especially in my work.
Decades since my first visit to Walden Pond, I realize I am not as odd or as alone as I often think. My tendency to complicate everything by disregarding my life’s tempo – yet again – amazes me and today humors me. This cyber-class experience opened up a new (to me who hasn’t finished formal education), forum; the Commons – a gathering place for fellow wordsmiths. I relish the relationships with kindred souls that began or developed from there.
For the first half of the semester I faced my tasks, and then a daily downward spiral. Fear of failure taunted me from energy wasted on self-imposed stress. While I stomped my foot, stared down the metronome wishing it to speed up the percussion section, just to catch up with the class assignments, I ignored my personal cadence. Bad form that.
Regardless of any academic course experiences, today I reaffirm I am a writer, good, bad or elsewise. Today, dear God, please help me be a great writer; to relax and enjoy the ride.