Over It


I can’t be that unique. With the flora that has fed and shaded us dying, I noticed emotions are also more heightened than usual. I wonder if that’s because the reminders of death are everywhere. Maybe it’s not just me. As life slows a bit everything seems to have more meaning.

We’ve passed Halloween. The Day of the Dead (Dia de Los Muertos) will be behind us soon. Perhaps that has me thinking more than usual about loved ones that have passed on.


Like it or not, loss is a huge part of life. I think the worst kind of loss is when humans fail to get over hurts and insults and neglect love.

With the year-end holidays in particular we like to gather with family and friends. My offspring and siblings learned early on to get over the bad stuff and appreciate our time together. Today we are geographically distant so keeping in touch requires extra effort, but I’m glad to say that with few exceptions we manage.

I imagine that’s part of why I can’t forget those who have gone on lately. I tried, but haven’t escaped the longing to see them, to be with them again. I’m just not ready to die to make that happen. Still, I miss very many loved ones.

So, today especially I thank God for my siblings, my offspring and my good friends. Though miles separate us, our mutual losses, one of our most prevalent common bonds also hold us together.

My prayers today are that we always remember that those we hold dear could be gone in a heartbeat. And that’s why I can be extra annoying with extra phone calls, texts and emails – now, before we are all caught up in the busy-ness of the holidays.

If some old issue continues to trip you up, I can’t encourage you enough to kick it out of the way and move on toward peace.

“The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them; he delivers them from all their troubles. The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” Psalm 34:17, 18 (NIV)


*Image courtesy James Gussy, 2018 Chicago, IL

**Image courtesy pixabay


Filed under Notes from the Apex

10 responses to “Over It

  1. I find myself in much conflict both Thanksgiving and Christmas because they have traditionally been so important to our family affairs. I feel both mentally and physically incapable of hosting affairs that meet with my dreams.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Me too, Oneta. Everything in life changing including the players in my story is my greatest challenge. It seems about the time I get a handle on life something goes and changes again. Still, considering the alternative, I’ll stick with it long as I can. 🍁💛🍂🌻

      Liked by 1 person

  2. It’s taken me a long time to arrive at this sort of enlightenment but I’m there. With a few exceptions, I can let it go.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Okay, I’ll stop complaining about my sister’s addiction to texting me about every little thing. Besides, I’m always reminded how many friends look at my sister and me and wish they had that.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. You get through the death of a Loved one but you never really get over it. After all a beloved family member, friend or pet is like an old piece of worn out clothing that you toss in the trash.

    A certain, song, TV show or an old saying brings back memories. Gradually the pain lessens as time passes but it’s still there. The upcoming holidays ie, Thanksgiving and Christmas will not be happy for everyone especially if your family died this year. In some traditions People don’t celebrate Christmas if they had a death in their family the preceding year. Mourning and grief are unique and specific to that person who is grieving.
    Certain days on the calendar don’t exist for me. Mothers and Fathers day. Even though my parents have been Dead for years. Being a New Yorker I never discuss, talk or write about 9/11. My Blogs pretty much go dark every year on that day. Way too traumatic. Christmas. I don’t celebrate Christmas I just participate for my brother Stephen. In 2014 my cousin died right before Christmas and since he never married nor had children I had to find out which morgue he was in and assist in the arrangements. Also many Single coworkers have been found dead and decomposed in their apartments around Christmas. It’s a holiday that brings on stress, heart attacks and strokes especially for People who either don’t have families or their families are far away. Before I retired I was happy to work Christmas day because job kept me busy so I was not miserable. This will be the first year that I will be off on Christmas but I have Stephen with me the weekend before Christmas so I can spend December 25th asleep in bed all day.

    Liked by 1 person

    • This touched my heart. I hope it does others too. Time to invite single co-workers to your Christmas celebration. It makes me sad to think there are those who associate Christmas with pain and loss and have no friends reaching out. Come to Tucson. You can celebrate it with my wacky family!

      Liked by 1 person

      • I’m retired. I don’t do Christmas. And holidays are the worst time to Travel. Fortunately my budget will keep me in New York. Nor do I have a Tree or decorations. Many People ignore Christmas. That’s normal. It would be an insult to all the People who passed away for me to celebrate this non holiday. And I don’t feel sorry for myself.
        I’m merely stating facts. I don’t think anyone should be forced into celebrating holidays they don’t agree with. Enforcement of happiness is not true happiness. Keeping it Real.


        • I respect your choices. We don’t do the tree or decorations. Or even presents (except maybe my sister, mother and aunt – I’m a jewelry maker so that’s easy). But for us, it’s a time to corporately (as a family) remember God becoming man for us – Christ’s birth. So we celebrate that event.
          I wish you peace.

          Liked by 1 person

          • Thanks. I have peace. Everyone is different. You’re fortunate to have family. Not everyone does. You make choices and decisions based on your situation. I keep my peace by avoiding holidays with negative connotations and stress. Therefore my peace is always with me.


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