This Can’t Be Good: Part III

I can’t make sense of it. I feel as though I can not wake from the strangest dream – a nightmare. All week long I looked and waited for my friend, trusting we will find each other. And yet, I shared the Passover meal with strangers at an inn.

On my way to the temple, desperate to find my friend I had to wait for the ugliest parade procession ever. That guy people talked about all week, paraded through the streets. He was beaten so badly I barely recognized his gruesome image, barely able to drag his cross. Days ago a celebrity and now being treated as a criminal. Some of the same people I saw celebrating him earlier were mocking and accusing him of some vague crimes.

It’s as if people have lost their minds. How I wish I knew what has become of my friend.

Hardly anyone at the temple, I felt lost and desolate. The week certainly did not go as I expected or would have imagined. I wandered aimlessly until I came to the city wall and looked over the countryside. I saw the crowd dispersing from three crosses, a man hanging from each of them. Too far to see clearly, I am certain that guy, that Jesus in the middle. I knew he was in for trouble. But this… Bewildering.

 

 

As I looked on from the wall, the sky seemed to fracture, the earth shook and the world became as dark at night. I was horrified. I lost all track of time. Then all I could think of was to get to the inn for the night.

Confused and shaken, I made my way not remembering how I got there or anything I said. Overwhelmed by the images in my head, the strange, dark weather, the hideous feelings, all I had seen, chilled to the bone despite the warm day, I felt entirely alone among the strangers around me.

I don’t understand. I have done my best to be good and worshiped God as long as I can remember. And yet I wonder if I had only imagined this God. This week seems to be too much for me. I must be tired. I must rest. But I can’t shake the picture of the crucifixion on that hill. God, please help me.

 

“Who may worship in your sanctuary, Who may enter your presence on your holy hill?”

Psalm 15:1 (NLT)

 

Images Google Royalty Free Images/Pinterest 

“Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law by becoming a curse for us, for it is written: “Cursed is everyone who is hung on a pole.” Galatians 3:13 (NIV)

 

Originally posted 2016 March 23 on What’s Next

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Mood Brood

Morning came far too early for my body’s liking. I’d overdone my workout again and paid the price for days; not resting sufficiently, stiff, sore and reluctant to move, moreover get out of bed.

I pushed myself however and made my way to a comforting, steaming mug.

Checking in at my desk:

• I’d almost overlooked a payment for next month’s budget
• One of the grand kids mentioned missing me for the 3rd time this month

Hmm… I checked the news:

• Hundreds of lives lost in storms and earthquakes, survivors left homeless…

With the third strike in the day’s first inning, I set out for a walk.*

After I realized I wasn’t actually praying I stopped mulling over my whine list with God. Instead I began thanking Him for everything I could see.

That’s when I heard her. Before I could see her I sensed her excitement. I was barely half way to the barn as the familiar squawking drew remarkably closer with my every heartbeat. For the first time in weeks, Silly Suzy had flown over the fence and was wobble-running to me as if for dear life, clucking loudly every step of the way.

Without my glasses she looked as if her very slightly raised wings were holding a skirt high enough to not drag in the wet soil as she hurried along.

I tell myself she’s so happy to see me because she’s very fond of me – it has nothing to do with me bringing fresh food to the coop every morning. I squat down low, despite the increased ache – she all but jumped into my arms so I could carry her back to the fence, letting her flutter down with the rest of the brood.

The less adventurous hens fluttered and squawked making way for her stuttered– 3-point landing. I’m sure translated she reported, “See there, I told you Old Dog’s gone,” before they all settled back into routine. As I walked away Rooster crowed a hearty “Thanks for restoring the peace.”

Rejuvenated, my pain levels vastly decreased from the extra movement, I returned to the cottage ready to work. For half an instant I thought about a comment First Born had made recently,

“You’re far too easily entertained these days, Mom. I’m getting concerned…”

I pray that years from now, after the grand kids leave home, friends and siblings are far too busy to pop in several times a week, First Born will have chickens – with at least one Silly Suzy.

*Go Cubs, Go!

“Wisdom is with the aged, and understanding in length of days.” Job 12:12 (ESV)+

 

+The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.